“When she was a child,
my love carried a road map in her hand
the way other girls carried handkerchiefs.”
I’m breaking up with you. It’s not you, it’s me….well kinda. You see, I don’t like to stay stuck in toxic places, and for the most part, well you were just that! Let me start off by saying I would have never thought the world would stop, for you, but it did. There are so many things I could go into here, but to make it simple you were selfish.
Above all, I will say thank you for all the madness that you brought. Yes, you read that right, THANK YOU! You may not feel like you deserve a thank you, but let me explain…..
I didn’t let you steal all that you wanted to. Sure, things in business had to change some, but it grew. Time with friends and family was interrupted occasionally, but we figured that one out and my relationships flourished. I found out who was all in with me, who was my ride or die, who would move mountains for me no matter what. Sadly, I also found out who wouldn’t. I was reminded of how important my health and running was when I hurt my foot and couldn’t run for 6 months. That wasn’t your fault, but I’ll include it in the mix. I took up a few new hobbies that kept me active while my foot healed, they kept my mind clear.
I got to spend more time with the pups, which always makes me happy. I hit a lot of my goals, even down to the last wire. I didn’t hit a lot of them too and I was able to give myself grace for that. Church, well you didn’t stop that, and my relationship with God engulfed me even more. I didn’t get to travel as much, but I finally pushed the fear back and did. On my first drive into Glacier National Park, I cried because I almost let you steal that from me willingly. I’m so happy I didn’t! (link to my trip here)
So 2020, peace out! You weren’t so merciful to others. People went through some pretty hard things, they are breaking up with you too, so be forewarned. But don’t put a smile on your face, they are better because of you too, even if they can’t see it just yet.
2021…you have a letter below…….
I have no clue what you hold, BUT I know who holds you..the Lord! Don’t be getting too crazy, I have trust issues now. Yesterday didn’t go as smoothly as I wanted it, but this is new. Hopefully, we will work through it. I don’t have a ton of goals planned out, but the ones I have planned out scare me! Most goals aren’t scary though, so we can pace ourselves. I pray that I will learn and grow even more this year. I pray we leave each other better than we found each other. I hope to be focused on business, Kingdom things but still, continue to wild at heart. I will put the Lord first in EVERYTHING and that HE will be my main focus… it HAS to be that way! I’m excited for the new things to come and ready for some things to fade. I have faith we will make it through this journey of a year stronger than ever.